Best Military Branch? The Air Force - Daily Ramblings - July 14, 2018

Time for day two of "Ridiculous Topics from Jason's Friends". Up today is the following.

I know you are saying, "How can a Marine write about how the Air Force is the best branch in the Military?" Or maybe you stopped at, "How can a Marine write?", first. Either way, I plan to attempt both in today's post.

First, the Air Force is the one branch which translates best over into the civilian world once you are done with your service. When you put on your resume that you were in the Air Force your potential employer views that as just another job you had. An employer views an Air Force vet as if they where in the Girl Scouts AND 4H Club. If a Marine puts on their resume that they are a Marine, the employer wonders how soon they would have to start "active shooter" training with their employees before the Marine's PTSD flairs up.

Secondly, Airmen are very giving. If they were to cross a mugger on the street, and if the mugger found out the person they were robbing was in the Air Force, the mugger would just ask for the money and the Airman would willing give it up. Both individuals know that all that time the Airman has spent behind a desk in an air conditioned room has led to onset osteoporosis. Neither person wants to see the Airman hurt. If is was a Marine on the other hand, the mugger will believe that they have met the mutant offspring of Chuck Norris and Genghis Khan, and that the Marine somehow has magical killing hands. The mugger would then give the Marine everything they had instead.

Lastly, Airmen are very humble people. When stories are told of the heroic battles on D-Day, Iwo Jima, or the Siege of Fallujah, the Airman lets the soldiers and Marines shine in their heroic actions. The Airman doesn't insist that those battles would not have been possible without their tactical air drops of supplies and bombs (which can now be done in many cases remotely from the comfort of a room - usually Stateside). They don't brag that their chances of dying while serving is less than that of a healthy, young civilian on the US. Whereas their counterparts, the Marines, are 20 times more likely to die while serving than an Airman. They are so humble in fact, that when heroic godlike stories are written about soldiers and Marines in combat, they patiently wait their turn to brag until one of their own becomes an astronaut who will revolutionize the writing pen and freeze dried food.

So if you want to be in the most comfortable, giving, and humble branch, then the Air Force is for you! If you want a better chance at surviving and being successful after your time serving, it is the best branch by a long shot!

However, if you want to be a mentally and physically strong modern day Spartan who is willing to lay down their life for their fellow countryman, may I suggest the degenerate bastards in the United States Marine Corps?